What do women want!

What do women want from a man? As hard a question as what do you want from us.  Impossible to get right if we move pass clichés, really... the answer itself changes throughout our life.  As we feel more certain about our identity, we perhaps have fewer things that we need from others, and therefore we look for someone that allows us to shine, rather than discover something inside us.

I guess the main ‘basic’ things that we might want from you would be safety and support.  However, just like you want to hear that you are hot and tough, we want you to look at us like we are beautiful, especially when we least expect it.  Just be honest, don’t say it just because; best are, not words but the look you get when you realize your heart just skipped a beat.

A man that shows you or tells you what he wants is nice, but one that is strong enough to take it is even better.  So, I guess the best way to put it, is just that, a STRONG MAN.  And I don’t really mean one that pumps weights and has the latest haircut and the right outfit... and thinks he is all that... PLEASE!!!

I mean one that will have the strength in character to say they find you interesting, cute, funny, crazy... whatever, and then have the guts to go – ‘ok, (i gotta know) let me buy you a coffee, I want to buy you a coffee, can I buy you a coffee – please don’t say you have soy milk’ - :P

Though I loved it when my friend Andrew picked me up and swung me around, every time I walked into the room; or when, to shut me up, Mark threw me over his shoulders and dragged me into the sea, because it was probably easier than arguing about... whatever!  It is confidence to trust that things could be good, or they could be sh***, but it is better to take a chance than to never know, that’s what we want – fearlessness.

I mean a man who is STRONG enough to follow his dreams and stick to his ideals, but who can also see that sometimes things change, new things come into play and that new perspectives might also be ok.  A man STRONG enough to admit he is sometimes not right, but who will take being right with a sense of decorum, not a smart attitude.  But also one who will venture down the road less travelled, the one that seems like an obscure dirt path, with obstacles and potholes and water on the ground, but that has a hint of a rainbow building at the end.  One that will remember original dreams, and who has the strength to go back and make them happen... no matter what!!!

A man who is STRONG enough to hold me up when I am falling, but who will also be strong enough to let me catch him, sometimes, when the tide is turned.

A man who is STRONG enough to follow his heart, even if it will cost him everything – because until we jump, we never know what is on the other side.  A man strong enough to leave everything, to try anything, to make mistakes – to walk in the dark and to fill it with lightness.

A man STRONG enough to know our lives come with a past, a jigsaw puzzle  full of linking pieces that make us who we are.  Sometimes these pieces don’t sit right, or seem hard to put together, but they make up the picture standing before us.

A man STRONG enough to walk beside me – not in front or behind.  Two paths walked side by side, not one path for two people.

I want a man with a heart of STEEL, soluble to the touch of my hand and the sound of my words.

A STRONG man who makes me laugh out loud, and understands that sometimes I am absolutely and utterly crazy and that my moods switch like the wind.  But, that I am faithful and honest, and speak my heart, if he is willing to listen.  And that I scream and slam doors and throw things – and he’ll be strong enough to put his hand on me to calm me.  But sometimes will also be strong enough to do it all back until we are laying flat on the floor, too tired and too loved up to do anything but hold each other tight.

Bonus points for any man who paints my portrait, writes me a song or takes my picture while I am sleeping.

I want a STRONG man who makes my heart, body and soul feel like being in the kitchen, pregnant and barefoot – a sense of home.

ps: my best friend would laugh at this one because when we were young and he described that was how he’d like to see me, I nearly took his head off.  Funny how the things we want change with age.  At 21 all I wanted was freedom, independence, and a nice man who would let me follow my dreams.  At middle age – the picture is different, for I know those ideals were only mine to achieve.